Articles written by Chris Dixon

What is Helium

About me - Chris Dixon

I am a happily married mother of two great kids. I have lived all over the country. I grew up in a violently abusive home and haven't spoken to my real father since I left home at 16 years old. I have since been homeless, promiscuous, ran around with thugs,

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Creative Writing > Poetry Poetry: Death: 11 of 693
ANGELI always wanted a guardian angelbut not this way.Please bring her back to meDear Lord I pray.I don't want her looking after meI want her here to hold.This is not the way I dreamedthe story would unfold.In fact I wish this was a dreamplease wake me now.Please say it was a nightmare,not true somehow.I know my angel is with... More..
Creative Writing > Poetry Poetry: Miscarriage: 1 of 48
Silent losses I have suffered.Ones that most can't see.From the moment I knew she was there,she was a part of me.They said she was a fetus,but I know thats not true.They did not feel the things I felt,or know the things I knew.Someone who's never felt a babygrowing deep inside,cannot possibly understanda mothers joy and pride... More..
Creative Writing > Memoirs Good-bye: True gardening stories relating to love, life and gardening: 7 of 272
Every thing has to have a beginning and an end. The cycle of life begins like a beautiful rose whose bud has just begun to show, a small hint of what is to come. So much promise and hope for the future.As the bud gently opens, she gracefully reveals her petals. The sweet perfume begins to escape, and we see her begin to dress... More..
Creative Writing > Poetry Poetry: Regret: 18 of 300
Today I lost my head again,said things I regret again,lost control of myself,and then,my words became hisagain.All the pain thats in my heart,I'm giving them right from the start.Tearing my own world apart,and all I hold dearest to my heart.They say you hurt the ones you love.I pray each day to God above,that thats not true, ... More..
Creative Writing > Poetry Poetry: Thinking: 7 of 70
My mindMy heartMy soulMy selfleft here sitting on a shelf.Left here in this hollow shell,burning upin my own hell.Crawling out of my own skin,running from my shameful sin.Recreating my own past,a better childhood, - at last!Dreaming up a life untrue,wishing Icould be like you. More..
Creative Writing > Poetry Poetry: Wishful thinking: 1 of 10
I wish someone could see inside,the real true Chrissy Sue.I wish someone could understand,the things that I want to.I wish someone could find a way,to touch me deep inside.I wish I could feel safe and loved,instead I want to hide.I wish the voices in my head,weren't full of so much hate.I wish that I could see my future,and u... More..
Society & Lifestyle > Personal Morals & Values Living with the past: 23 of 204
Daddy's little girl,with curly locks of gold.Wanting to make him happy,doing what I was told.I tried to be a good girl,didn't want to make him mad.But somehow, I could never do right,guess I was just born bad.At time it seemed he loved me so much,he would spend all his time with me.He said I was his princess,he was as proud a... More..
Relationships & Family > Domestic Violence & Abuse The legacy of childhood sexual abuse: 3 of 21
What doesn't kill you ~ makes you stronger. This is the legacy of childhood sexual abuse. Except that childhood sexual abuse DID kill me. It killed the innocent child I was before I understood what was happening. Before I could comprehend words like sexual abuse, or lust or pornography.Sexual abuse is the most despicable of a... More..
Relationships & Family > Married Life When is a marriage not a marriage: 1 of 7
It seems strange referring to my first marriage, as a marriage at all. In retrospect it really wasn't much of one. My definition of marriage, as a partnership, as a union of souls is so much different today, than it was during my first 'so called' marriage.Perhaps my warped ideals of marriage first began as a little girl drea... More..
Creative Writing > Poetry Poetry: Inner struggles: 107 of 531
If I could change the worlderase the night.Destroy my demonsand make it all right.Respect myself,regain my trust.Remember my daddy,instead of his lust.Then Id be whole,not split in two.Fighting within,not knowing whats true.Unspeakable actsare unspeakable words.on deaf ears they fall,never to be heard.No control then,no contr... More..